la mauvaise louve-à travers les temps et l'espace


  • in my head: constructs witty and insightful answers to interview questions for when I'm famous
  • ordering at a restaurant: please i the soup want

ygrittesnow:

when we were babies my dad was a stay-at-home dad while my mom kicked ass in the courtroom but he would carry my twin brother and me around with one baby on the front and one on his back in backpacks

and women would come up and look at how cute i was and coo over me and be like “awww how cute wow”

and my dad would be like, “YOU KNOW WHAT’S CUTER THAN ONE BABY”

and then he’d spin around

and BAM

there was my brother


actualcannibal:

actualcannibal:

wow chubby babies are literally the cutest I could just eat them up

ok wow my url definitely makes this problematic


pratfall:

in australia we don’t have mistletoe so we just have to kiss under the influence 


nue:

me trying to think of a good insult: youre a fucking potato floor


mexicanmanatee:

Shhhh, I still like Ringo.


rabioheab:

a boy and a girl are sitting together on a bench after a romantic date. “can i kiss you?” the boy says. the girl nods and the boy pulls out black and white face paint and starts putting it on her face. “you’re going to be gene simmons” he whispers.